HOWARD ROBERT MARKS

Condolences & Memories (5 entries)

• To Randy, Joanne and family my deepest sympathy in the loss of your Dad. I remember all of the great times we had with your Mom and Dad. They will be missed. - Posted by: Joan Oko (Sister In Law) on: Nov 14, 2013

• A copy of my Eulogy I’m Joanne, Howard’s daughter. Thank you for coming to celebrate my dad’s life. And thank you to Lewis and Springs Church. Not just for today, but for the support and comfort you’ve given my parents since they first started coming here. I think everyone knew my dad as a fun-loving man who would help anyone who needed it. I’m going to tell you what he was like from a daughter’s perspective. Dad was born April 16, 1927. He lived 86 years. He saw some amazing changes happen in this world during that time. Dad’s personality didn’t particularly love change, but he embraced it. Dad was a rock and he rose to every challenge. I think his first major challenge was when his mother died when he was around 16 – a tough time to lose your mother, and his dad, a typical Englishman, wasn’t particularly motherly to fill that role. Dad met the love of his life playing baseball. Mom always said she was attracted to his long legs. They were married in 1954. Their marriage was filled with joy, hardship, commitment, but maybe most importantly, love and respect. I’ve come to believe that they were soul mates. Three years into their marriage, a brat, I mean my brother Randall was born. (Just kidding.) Three and a half years after that, daddy’s little angel was born. (The power of words is amazing, isn’t it?) Now that the family was complete, dad figured we needed a bigger house. So we moved to St. James. That’s a time when dad started really worrying about money. You may know that my dad was an accountant for Air Canada for 36 years 5 months. When he started, it was a 10 man office and the airline was called Trans Canada Airlines. Now, I was going to do an accounting joke, but I really couldn’t find any that fit dad. He was not the stereotypical boring accountant. But in some ways, he was a typical accountant. He was always announcing that we were going to the poor house, in the poor house, or totally bankrupt! But, in the next breathe he was making sure we packed enough for our upcoming trip to Barbados or Disney Land. Dad was a real “company” man. He believed that working for Air Canada was a privilege – that they allowed him to work for them so he could support his family. Dad taught me to live by this creed for any company I work for. But he also taught me to appreciate Air Canada – not just for the free flights. Also for their Christmas parties and summer picnics! On one particular trip, we were taxiing down the tarmac and the Air Canada jet abruptly stopped and returned to the gate. After an hour long wait, we finally took off. Dad was curious, so he asked the flight attendant, “What was the problem?” The flight attendant responded “The pilot was bothered by a noise he heard in the engine – and it took us a while to find a new pilot!” Sorry dad, no more Air Canada jokes. Dad loved to travel. I loved to travel with dad because he loved to travel in style. No backpacking for him. It was nice hotels and rented cars. But dad also had some ruggedness in him. We camped at West Hawk Lake when Randall and I were young. We then moved into renting cabins.(Knotty Pine – Ice Box) In the 70’s, we rented a cabin by the lake that had a private beach and dock. Dad would bring the speed boat he built. He was so proud of it and he was also very proud to take us on tours of the lake and to teach us to water ski. As Randall got older and started taking the speed boat out more often, dad started bringing his fishing boat as well. Dad was very generous because that became the boat I would take out. His generosity became even more apparent when he continually took the family out fishing with him. It was generous because when the family was with him, he usually didn’t catch anything. Mom and Randall seemed to catch them all. I thought he just had bad luck, but I later realized that he was so busy getting us set up, that he barely had time to put his own line in the water. Dad loved fishing. He especially looked forward to his annual May long weekend “guys” fishing trip. Mom figured they were going out to party and she was ok with it, but he always came home with lots of fish! Dad was very practical and methodical. I’m really not sure how he coped with my mom, my brother, and myself, but he did. And he never expected us to be like him. (Although he may have secretly wished it.) Dad always encouraged me to follow my dreams. He said I could accomplish whatever I wanted to and he believed it. Dad would give advice when I asked for it, but always supported me if I didn’t follow it. One of his most important qualities to me is that he never judged me and he was always my cheerleader. Some of the lessons dad taught me were never to swear (well, almost never) because, at least back then, it wasn’t a classy thing to do. He taught me a good work ethic, to have fun at whatever I’m doing, and to not take life so seriously. That’s how dad lived his life (except maybe when it came to money, but we all have something we worry about.) He taught me to dance by standing on his feet. So if you ever saw him limping, that was probably why. Dad was a great dancer and once he hit the floor, there was no stopping him. And we can’t forget dad’s Mid Life Crisis. He and Randall decided to get their Motorcycle license. They took the Manitoba Safety Council Motorcycle course. On week 6, dad came home with a broken arm. So much for that idea. There are so many things I could tell you about my dad, like how he built a box kite that we couldn’t get to fly for love or money. But that wasn’t the point. The joy was in the experimenting – in the trying – in the journey. And dad saw life as one big journey – with hardships to make you stronger and joys to help you keep things in perspective. Dad even managed to keep a sense of humour at times during his struggle with alzheimer’s. I often brought Lazer, our dog to visit. On one particular day, when I announced that we were leaving, he said, “OK, but the dog stays!” During dad’s life, he always had a joke and signed all his cards to me “To my favourite daughter.” Dad and Randall were always telling each other “See ya in the funny papers.” In fact, that was the last thing dad said to Randall. Special. A couple of days ago, I started going through some of mom’s things. I found a card that she bought. It was like she was speaking to me. Now I want to especially direct the message to Hayley, Pierce, Randall, Peter and to everyone else who has lost a loved one. Losing someone we love is never easy to accept, And sometimes it must seem as if the pain is almost too much to bear. But I believe that your love will outlast the pain of the grief you’re feeling.... I believe that you have a place deep in your heart where treasured memories will always live. And one day those memories will be a tremendous comfort to you. Until the day when you can smile again, I hope it helps to know how sorry I am and how much I care. Mom and Dad cared. When mom passed away 7 months ago, dad started going downhill fast. He started giving up on life. In the beginning, he didn’t understand that mom had passed. After a while, he stopped asking for her. We were called to his bedside at 4:45 a.m. on Tues. Nov 5th. It was a long, but special 17 hours we spent with dad before he passed. I was able to read the bible to him, sing his favourite hymns and talk to him. The joke is that he died to get away from my singing. Randall, of course, was also there and his dear friends, Sarah and George. Dad had told me a week earlier that he was dying and that he was afraid. I think we were all able to offer him comfort and reassure him that we would hold his hand until he was ready to go into mom’s outstretched arms. We were able to tell him that mom was waiting and it was ok to go because we would be alright. I feel privileged to have been able to spend those hours with him. I feel even more privileged to be his daughter. He was a great dad. I will end with a poem that seems fitting of dad’s attitude toward life. It’s by Theodora Kroeber When I am dead, cry for me a little. Think of me sometimes but not too much. It’s not good for you or your wife or your husband or your children To allow your thoughts to dwell too long on the dead. Think of me now and gain as I was in life at some moment which is pleasant to recall. But not for too long. Leave me in peace, as I shall leave you in peace. While you live, let your thoughts be with the living. Thank you dad. I love you. - Posted by: Joanne Marks (Daughter) on: Nov 14, 2013

• I always remember Howie as one of my favorite uncles. He always opened his home to family. I still remember get togethers at Helen and Howie's----lots of food and frienship - Posted by: GARY OKO (NEPHEW) on: Nov 12, 2013

• To Randy, Jo-Anne and familes, please except our deepest sympathies in the loss of your Dad. As mentioned he is now with your Mom, together again as it always was. Your Dad and Mom were both such wonderful people and Barb and I were always made to feel welcome in their home when visiting with Jo-Anne. They were terrific parents to you both and I know you will miss them. I saw your Mom last a few years ago in Safeway on Sturgeon Rd., and we started visiting as if we had seen them just the day before. Keep your memories close and they will always be with you. Unfortunately we are in Florida on vacation or would have loved to attend the service. - Posted by: Don & Barb Bissett (Friends of years past) on: Nov 09, 2013

• My deepest sympathy for loss. I was part of Howard's retirement skit we gave for him. He was a wonderful and fun loving man. - Posted by: Wendy Jackson (Friend) on: Nov 09, 2013