ERICA ROGERS (VAN DEN BEUKEN)

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ERICA ROGERS (nee VAN DEN BEUKEN) December 1, 1951 - November 15, 2015 I believe people should write their own obituaries, and I have done this with Terry's help to fill in the blank spots for me. I am survived by my partner/companion/caregiver, and love of my life, Terry. "May God give you a long and happy life. You have given me so much that I cannot find the words to thank you. I love you and always will. There are very few who can give of themselves the way you do. Love always. I am survived by brother Robert (Margaret and children), Edmonton, and John (Maggie and children), Winnipeg, as well as extended family in the Netherlands. I was married to Dr. Arnold Rogers for twenty years until he passed away in December 2001. Terry and Arnold hit it off the first time they met. That really surprised me -- a motorcycle bum and my husband, the doctor. I caught them reading poetry together in the big room. They took Minnie, our shih tzu, for a walk that first night. Terry won Minnie's heart, and Arnold took to him as well. Our supper together that night was the start of a wonderful friendship. Terry, an A.A. member since 1979, gave me hope that I, too, could gain sobriety. Terry gave me those special hugs that very often helped keep me sober for a period of time. I was an emergency room nurse at both Misericordia and St. Boniface General Hospitals before I retired to become Arnold's secretary and nurse in his office. Before Arnold's passing he told Terry to take care of me, and Terry responded with a simple, "Okay. How?" Terry and I have been together for over twelve years. I was 55 when I was first diagnosed with breast cancer. My partner/companion/lover now became my Number One caregiver. He took me for chemotherapy every Monday for six months and stayed by my side through 25 days of radiation, fifty-four weeks of Herceptin, fourteen breast surgeries, and a year of wearing a breast pump. 24/7 he took care of me. This summer, after being in Misericordia, I was told the cancer had returned and I ended up at Riverview. That's when Terry totally took over and kept me alive until November 15. A special thank you to Co-op Pharmacy, Grant Park, for taking such good care of me and going that extra mile to make sure I was well taken care of. Thanks to Sheila, my family doctor, for so many years. We went through a lot together, but now I am done with the long, hard struggle. Thanks to Rosemarie, John and Nolan for all the help through the years. Nolan, keep up with your music. Dr. Stew, my long-time buddy, we have been through a lot. You have been there through thick and thin, good times and bad. Stew, help our Terry through this rough time for him. Thanks, Daily Degagne, for all your advice, and concern. You truly helped me out. Marion: God, I love you. We have been friends since we were teenagers. Please help Terry out. You know my wishes -- no questions asked. Thanks to that special person at TD Canada Trust on McPhillips for all the help you provided me. Punkin, you know who you are. Thanks for being my special angel. Last year at Gimli was wonderful. Sorry we did not get a chance this year. I was just too sick. Thanks to the nursing staff of Palliative Care both at Riverview and at home, and also to all the nurses on 3 East at Riverview. I know you will miss me calling out "Terry, Terry, Terry," often followed by "Tony, Tony, Tony," sometimes waking up all the patients on the third floor at night. I am sorry that Terry was the only one with me at the end, but I was so sick that I wanted people to remember me as I was when they last saw me, not as I was near the end. From Thursday night until Sunday night at 11:00 p.m., Terry was at my side praying with me every day, thanking God for taking care of me for that day, and asking Him to keep taking care of me for the next day as long as He saw fit. I taught Terry that it was okay for men to cry. For four days straight before the end, Terry talked to me non-stop giving me his love and support. Graveside services were held at Shaarey Zedek Cemetery, Rabbi Bill Weissman officiating, on Thursday, November 15, at 11:00 a.m. Prior to my death, Marion, Terry and I met with CancerCare Manitoba. They know my wishes -- part of my estate is going there, mostly to help female cancer patients. Those are my wishes. In lieu of flowers, donations may be sent to Palliative Care, Riverview, #1 Morley Avenue, or CancerCare, MB, 675 McDermot Avenue. Mom, Minnie, Arnold -- I am with you all -- and I love you all.

As published in Winnipeg Free Press on Nov 21, 2015