HILARY KAUFMAN LERNER

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HILARY KAUFMAN LERNER Suddenly on January 19, 2016, at the Health Sciences Centre, Hilary Kaufman Lerner passed away at the age of 51. Hilary is survived by her beloved husband, Brian, her daughter, Rebecca, and her son, Jonathan. She is also survived by her mother, Barbara Kaufman, and her sister, Jennifer Kaufman (Garth Wyrchowny). She was predeceased by her father, Barry Kaufman, in 2008. Born in Winnipeg on March 27, 1964, Hilary attended Laidlaw School and then St. John's-Ravenscourt School. She took part in everything, from school plays to piano lessons. She learned to knit intricately-woven sweaters and other clothes for her family, including later in life, baby clothes for her own children. She loved Brownies and worked to earn more badges than anyone. She was a child who took to life and knew how to be happy, with a twinkle in her eye that sustained her throughout her years. Hilary attracted a broad cross-section of friends, was interested in the tiniest details of their lives and revelled in their company. She was the light of the room, the one making everyone laugh and, by sheer cajoling and coaxing, finding a way to make everyone in the room have more fun than they were already having! In 1985, at the age of 21, Hilary was forced to confront the harsh reality of the diagnosis that she had Multiple Sclerosis. When she was told that there was no cure for the disease and little treatment for its symptoms, she resolved to fully live her life. Whenever she might have a bad day, she did not complain. She refused to consider herself a victim and would not give the time of day to anyone who looked at her in that light. Hilary and Brian first met in university. They started out as friends, but by 1989, there was no denying that they were meant to be together. He was the love of her life and she was his, and they married on December 29, 1991. Hilary then embarked on her MBA at the Asper School of Business. When the symptoms of her MS worsened, she refused to let them deter her from completing her degree, from travelling, or from simply enjoying the company of her friends. By the mid-1990s, Hilary decided that her immediate priority in life was to raise a family. In her typical fashion, she thoroughly researched the effects of pregnancy and child-rearing on MS, looking for guidance. When she discovered that no guidebook existed, she made up her own. With the births of Rebecca and Jonathan, Hilary embraced motherhood with the same determination she brought to everything she undertook. As they grew, Hilary never wanted them to ever feel that they had anything but a full childhood, even when she could no longer walk. She took them to the park, on outings, and never missed a dance or voice recital, hockey or baseball game or band concert. Her children were at all times foremost in her mind, and her love for them was boundless. In the last several years, the challenges that Hilary faced continued to mount. Yet, despite this adversity, she continued to live with dignity, resolve and defiance. Her love of life and her determination to overcome anything that stood in her way will never be forgotten. Funeral services were held on January 22, 2016, at Shaarey Zedek Synagogue, officiated by Cantor Anibal Mass. Pallbearers were David Kroft, Garth Wyrchowny, Mark Lander, Steven Kohn, Ted Bock and Jonathan Kroft. If so desired, donations may be made to the Multiple Sclerosis Society of Canada, Jewish Foundation of Manitoba, Health Sciences Centre Foundation or to a charity of your choice.

As published in Winnipeg Free Press on Feb 13, 2016