DORIS CARLTON

Condolences & Memories (12 entries)

• Here is the letter I wrote to Doris on the day that Ernie called with the sad sad news that cancer was spreading throughout her body. I cried as I wrote it and I cried when I read it on the day Ernie left me the message that “Doris passed away this morning.” Dearest Doris: Let’s talk about Ernie. When he and I were growing up, we knew each other for a lifetime, it seemed. Our friendship spanned from the time in his life and my life when standing in a mud puddle was important, all the way to being part of each other’s wedding, and far, far beyond. If ever the word “friend” will be correctly defined, our picture will be in the dictionary as the best ever example. Ernie was always Ernie. Our attempts at “mud-puddling” and having adventures downtown Winnipeg with other friends passed from us when puberty hit. He was first, puberty-wise, I think, as he had an older brother. In the Funnell English-Ukrainian family, we never even thought of puberty. It was a baaad word, like f-a-r-t. Phil helped Ernie because Phil was so surprised at his discoveries, he passed the revelations on to his brother, in case Ern would miss getting puberty-ised. Ernie hung around with many people, had many friends, and was always around when there was a gathering. We would stand on a corner of the street, on a Sunday night. Spitting out the salted shells and eating the seeds of the sunflower. It was a Winnipeg thing. The center of your lips would get sore from breaking the shell, because the outsides were so salty. In that group, usually was Ernie. Ernie was friends with my first girlfriend before I was. The three of us would seemingly do everything together, except, of course, the things that girl and boyfriends did together, in those days. Her and I were always trying to find Ernie a person he could date. There was Ruby, the neighborhood girl who invited the three of us over to her house when her parents were gone, one afternoon. We were over there, innocent as can be, and the Father came home. You never saw three kids move so fast in your life. We were being good, but with Ruby screaming, “Get out, get out!! It’s my father! It’s my father!” We scrambled out the door, appearing to be guilty as sin, grabbing our shoes, and running down the block. I think Ruby was grounded for the rest of her life, as we did not recall seeing her again. Then there was Yvonne. She was in the Army. As the four of us walked the streets of our Northend neighborhood, she wanted to pick a fight with anyone (man, woman, child, cat or dog) that even glanced her way. She was not for Ernie. After all, we were only just teenagers. There were others, I am sure, that Ernie may have told you about. Jeanne and I drifted apart. But that is another story. Then, for a brief period of time, it was Ernie and I again. Ernie was always around friends, whilst I was more of a loner. I went roller-skating to meet girls my age (now 14). Soon I was travelling to St. Vital to see a group of girls my age, along with a group of guys from that neighborhood. And I found someone for Ernie. Off to St. Vital went he and I, only to have my pairing-off not work. Ernie was sort of a Jerry Lewis. Likeable, but you wouldn’t want to take him home to meet your mom. Elmwood girls, I tried again. No luck. We did not connect with each other the first few months of my high school. One night, at this time, as I sat in my room, looking out the window at the snow softly falling, late at night, I asked myself to count all my friends that I had up to that point in my life. As I sat there, on Aikins Street in Winnipeg, I stared at my ten fingers, ready to say. “One. Two...” and so on. I was stuck on “one”. I had no friends. Oh, there were people I could say, “hello” to and people I could wave to, but there was no one I could call up and just hang out with. Flo and I had not met yet. I finally realized there was Ernie. Of course, Ernie is on the list of my friends. In fact he was the list of my friends. So the next day I walked over to Charles and Pritchard, knocked on the door, and there was Ernie. We had lost touch, but it was as though we were seldom seen relatives. I had my one friend again. After Flo and I met, Ernie was a part of our lives. We went places, as a threesome, and we tried to pair him with someone. Anyone. Then he told me he wanted to join the St. James Police Force, and asked me for a letter of recommendation. He got the job, in spite of what I wrote, and you know the rest of the story. We had not met you, but whenever we saw Ernie he told us the story of meeting this beautiful person, who was a stewardess. “Yes, yes,” we said, knowing that Ernie’s womanizing history was bleak, to say the best. But you became part of his life. You were his life. You are his life. When we first met you, I was so happy for Ernie. You are a beautiful person, now as you were then. I am sure your acceptance of us was mutual. As we have been a foursome since that first meeting. In your life, you two together, are the best, most important, most inspiring, most dedicated couple. You were perfect for each other. It is the same today. Trials and tribulations and life changes are coming for all of us. We have to be believe that all we go through to be born, and grow, and suffer and age, is more than just an accident. This universe is Billions of miles across. The nearest star to us is many, many light years away. In all this immensity, this human race cannot be an accident. All we go through is not for naught. The miracles we experience every day in our lives has to be greater than we understand. Don’t ask me how or when or where or how, but in my heart, and my soul, our foursome will be together again. I have dibs on the 23rd Psalm. It is my day in June of my birth. Have Ernie read it with you. Savour each word, and find peace in his reading. Be it in Winnipeg, Kelowna, Vancouver, Lynnwood, or someplace else, we will be a foursome again. Looking forward to it. Warren and Flo - Posted by: Flo and Warren Funnell (Friends) on: Aug 02, 2016

• I met Mrs C when I was in junior high school. A lovely woman. I still have a ceramic jewellery box she made for me for my birthday. My thoughts to Mr C. Bob Bonnie and family on your loss. Rest in Pesce Mrs. C. - Posted by: Cathy Marshall (McIntyre) (Friend) on: May 26, 2016

• It is so sad to hear of Doris's passing yet she left so many beautiful memories for her dear family and friends. I recall the trip that Ernie, Doris and I made from Winnipeg to Regina to attend her brother (and my dear friend) Herb's funeral so many years ago. We shared our grief and throughout the years had never forgotten Herb as those who loved Doris will never forget her. And before my mother passed on July 8, 2015, she often spoke of Herb who was so special to our family as was Doris and Wayne and Mr. Bastedo especially after Mrs. Bastedo passed. I used to read the wonderful newsy Christmas letters that Doris sent to my mother, Jean Joncas each year and her love of her Ernie and her dear family always shone through. My thoughts are with you as are those of my brothers, Bob and Chuck. - Posted by: Irene (Joncas) Behrmann (Former neighbour from 62 Charles Crescent, Regina, Saskatchewan) on: May 10, 2016

• Although it has been some time since I last saw Doris or Ernie I do have fond memories of both of them. My most sincere sympathy to Ernie and the family. Vince from Edmonton. - Posted by: Vince Laberge (Friend) on: May 09, 2016

• We are so very sorry for your loss, Doris always had a smile and kind word for one and all we will miss her at our gym workouts. I will put a reserved sign on her workout bike. - Posted by: Bruce & Joan Priem (Friends) on: May 07, 2016

• This beautiful lady gave me my soul mate, my best friend, my beautiful husband. forever I will be grateful to her for that. I will miss her hugs of perfection, and her infectious smile....Love you always Mom C - Posted by: Marlisle Carlton (Daughter-in-law) on: May 05, 2016

• Our heart-felt sympathy to Ernie, Bob, Bonnie and families. Doris was a special cousin of whom we saw too little. The first born in this generation of our corner of the Bastedo family she held a special place in the hearts of all the aunts and uncles. It is my deep regret that we won't have another opportunity to meet but we will remember her fondly. - Posted by: Cheryl Bastedo (Cousin) on: May 04, 2016

• I'm so saddened to hear of Doris' passing. She was such a lovely person. I loved hearing all about her adventures. She always put a smile on my face. My deepest condolences to her family, especially, my friend, Bonnie. Sending much love and prayers to you all. - Posted by: Debbe Clark (Friend) on: May 04, 2016

• Words can never really express how one feels when losing a dear, long time friend of almost 50 years. Mostly I am very sad but I,m so pleased that I was able to tell her how much I loved her, when I last saw her. Doris and I spent many hours together sitting over a bottle of wine, usually after going out for lunch. The time time we spent together would go so quickly and and we always looked forward to the next time. But there will be no next time and I will miss that profoundly. Doris was a wonderful, quiet person, so full of talent and many surprises.She had a great sense of humour and was a truly beautiful person, inside and out. Bill and I will miss our breakfasts with Doris and Ernie, at each other's homes. Our thoughts are with Ernie, Bob and Marlisle,Bonnie and Derek and Wayne and Marlys. - Posted by: BronwenYewdall (Friend) on: May 04, 2016

• Ahh Doris my dear friend. You brightened our moments at Hogwarts...I loved your stories of Brekkies with friends, and the moments of your life you shared with us all. The beautiful cards you made and sent. I remember when you first started with us online and you would laugh when you didnt get something right..what you didnt know was you really, truly, DID get it all right. You will be deeply missed. We will make sure to talk to Bonnie and see if we cant get her to smile some. I love you, Dors, till we meet again "beyond the veil". Rest well, sweet lady.... With love and good memories, Holly - Posted by: Holly Balzer-Harz (Friend) on: May 04, 2016

• Doris was such a blessing to all she met either in person or online. Her wonderful stories, hospitality, and infectious positive personality always made her such a joy to know. I will miss you sweet lady, thank you for the time you were in my life. - Posted by: Jan Gray (friend) on: May 04, 2016

• So saddened at the passing of Mrs. C, a second mom to so many of us growing up. She was always so cheery and welcoming to us and genuinely loved people. A nicer person you would never find. Sincere condolences to Ernie, Bob, Marlisle, David, Bonnie and Derek. - Posted by: Chris Dant, Karen Stuart and Thomas (Long Time Friends) on: May 04, 2016