LARRY JIJIAN

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LARRY JIJIAN Summarizing a life is very difficult. Inevitably, the essence of the person is somewhat obscured by historical and logistical detail. He lived here, he travelled there, he worked at this and he enjoyed that. No matter the list of accolades and accomplishments, mere facts cannot reveal something as complex as a human life. And yet, tradition demands the attempt: Larry David Jijian, father of Mike and Leanne, beloved husband of Linda, brother of Lynda and grampa to Brendon passed peacefully and with great dignity after a long and heroic battle with cancer. He was predeceased by his father Chris and his mother Kay. Larry was born under a coal oil lamp in a farmhouse in Cupar, SK on June 20, 1941. Early in his childhood, the family relocated to Port Colburn, ON. He always recalled this period of his life as a time of great freedom and fearlessness. Larry's first job was delivering newspapers. He put his scrupulously-saved salary towards amassing a fleet of pedal bikes. He told stories of roping the back tires of someone else's bike to a train trestle over the Welland Canal and riding it over and over again off the edge and into the water far below as the big ships waited to churn past. His family moved again in his grade 11 year, this time settling in Fort Garry, MB. By then, the fleet of bicycles had become a series of cars, most notably a sleek Mercury trailing a foxtail from the radio antenna. Larry worked alongside his father at Chris' Auto Machine Shop until the early 1960s when Safeway bought the land and put up the Pembina and McGillivray location. By that time, Larry had married Linda Michael. Larry paid cash for a house at 934 Holly Ave. with the money he had saved for a brand new Corvette. Although unable to have children of their own, both were determined to raise a family. They adopted, bringing Mike home first, followed shortly by Leanne. To support his family Larry took a job at the Gamble's service station, and when that evaporated, he went to work for the Manitoba Government. He retired 26 years later. Larry spent the final decade of his life dealing with and battling a series of cancers. Those with experience know that this is a war with many fronts. While Larry endured surgeries and treatments, he poured his energy into ensuring that Linda was provided for. And while he experienced periods of despair, he made his final stand with such powerful grace and self-effacing dignity that we who are left behind can only marvel at his strength. Larry entered the care of the Grace Hospice on July 28, 2004 and died peacefully at 4:00 a.m. on January 3, 2005. And so ends the chronology of a life in which it is possible to correctly infer that Larry was a man who learned early who he was, defined the limits of his aspiration and endeavoured to make the best life he could for those around him with the tools at his disposal. We should all be so lucky. What is left out is the extent to which Larry Jijian was a facilitator and a nurturer. In order to discover that, you would have to sit and listen to the stories his family will tell over meals and wine in the years to come. These stories are the lifeblood of Larry's legacy. They are the true measure of a man who never reached beyond his means, who counted the achievements of his children more vital than his own, and who achieved greatness on his own terms. There will be stories about the friends Larry made around the world. About Mick and Angela Day in Topsham, Exeter, about Jan and Ron Fraser in Tauranga, New Zealand, about Nicole, James and Grace Darcey in White Hills, Tasmania, and about Peter and Margaret Alu in Ghana, West Africa. There will be stories about the great passions of Larry's life. About going to the Winnipeg Speedway with Grampa, about taking part in his daughter's passion for ringette - thousands of hours of getting Leanne and her friends to local games, provincial events and national tournaments, and thousands more acting as the Fort Garry Community Club's Ringette convener, making sure that hundreds of other girls experienced the game. There will be stories about the meals, social gatherings of an epic scale around the dining room table, or - even better - around the barbecue in the back yard. Larry loved to try new restaurants, experience new foods (especially from other countries) and then recreate them at home. His lifetime's experience in this arena can be distilled into this often-repeated nugget of wisdom: Every culture has a perogie . There will be stories told about Larry's horticultural gift. About the way he loved to grow things, to see what a plant liked and then provide it until he was rewarded with the most sincere validation that can be given - a generous blooming. Oddly, Larry hated to pull a weed. To his way of thinking, they weren't bad, they were just plants that nobody liked very much. Millions would disagree, but it didn't seem to hurt his results any. He used to maintain a veggie garden under the power poles near McGillivray that produced spuds, corn, cukes and zucchini. He planted dozens of trees around the cabin at Brereton Lake and built the flower beds there that formed the backdrop for Leanne's wedding pictures. He grew orchids in his basement that flowered so fully that classrooms came from Crane School to see them. During the week that Larry was admitted to the hospice, his living room was carpeted in blossoms from more than a dozen potted plants, including his Christmas Cactus and Cyclamen. It was generally agreed that this was a demonstration of gratitude. There were no unimportant people as far as Larry could tell. Each person had a gift and a story. Each person was worthy of interest and respect. He didn't have a lot of close friends, but the ones he invited into his life received the full measure of his generous personality. He responded with deep emotion to people who understood him for who he was. The nurses and volunteers at Grace Hospice, expressing their condolences after Larry's passing, spoke with great emotion about his need to create a community among the residents which extended to their families. The dinner table, they said, got more crowded once he arrived. Of all the people Larry knew, none were more important than his family. The love he felt for his parents and his sister can most easily be seen in his unflagging loyalty. Larry saw Chris and Kay every day even after he married Linda and moved into his own home. After Chris passed away, Larry attended to Kay with an uncommon and beautiful devotion. Kay moved to Salt Spring so that Larry's sister Lynda could take over for him in this capacity. The practical necessity of this decision did nothing to assuage Larry's agony over his inability to continue. There will be special stories told about the two proudest moments of Larry's life: the marriages of his children: Leanne to Bob Hume on August 14, 1999, and Mike to Shannon Sweet on April 12, 2003 in Coquitlam, BC. It was only after Mike's we wedding reception that Larry and Linda informed the family that Larry's cancer had shown up again and that it was now in his bones. They had waited so as not to divert attention from the celebration. And there will be stories about the joy Larry experienced from taking an active part in raising Mike’s son Brendon. As is the case in many modern families, the separation of a couple creates unique situations requiring complex compromises. Larry embraced his role as Mike’s standard bearer and, as is his way, managed to jerry rig something miraculous out of the material at hand. Larry and Linda took Brendon into their home for alternate weekends and as much of the summer as was feasible. In Larry’s eyes, Brendon could do no wrong. They shared hours of quality time in which Larry was both facilitator and nurturer. Hours before he died, Brendon sat at his bedside, a 13 year old facing the dwindling of his grandfather with a courage and maturity far beyond his years and gave Larry a powerfully comforting message. "You taught me how to fish," Brendon said. And under the blanket of medication, through the curtain of pain, and near the end of a war fought on many fronts, Larry heard and managed to communicate a smile. That is the essence of who he was. Larry Jijian’s life will be celebrated in a service at the Grace Hospice at 1:30 p.m. on Saturday, January 8. The following reception will last until 4:00 p.m. The Grace Hospice is located at 260 Booth Dr. Parking is limited so please plan your arrival accordingly. The Jijian family wishes to express their gratitude to the staff, volunteers, residents and visitors of the Grace Hospice for the exceptional care and compassionate attention Larry received during his stay there. They request that, in lieu of flowers, a donation be made to either the Grace Hospice, 260 Booth Dr., Winnipeg, MB R3J 3R5 or CancerCare Manitoba, #109 - 675 McDermot Ave., Winnipeg, MB R3E 0V9. THOMSON "IN THE PARK" FUNERAL HOME & CEMETERY McGILLIVRAY BLVD. 925-1120

As published in Winnipeg Free Press on Jan 06, 2005